Ladies and Gentlemen, I have come from the future to present to you the newest conspiracy everyone across America will soon be raving about!

Using completely-not-random technology, I have discovered how to mine the current news cycle to discover what hare-brained idea will become the next talking point or blog article for thousands of random weirdos!

Behold, when you press "refresh," how a brand new (or maybe not new) conspiracy will mysteriously appear!

Save the picture and share it, unironically, with your friends! You'll get ahead of the curve and be seen as some adept prognosticator who will then get in with the (insert gender of your choice here, as long as it's one of the obviously only two)!

ACCOUNT • FORUM • SUPPORT is written in front of a live studio audience